13 Ways to Keep a Conversation with a Woman Who Leaves You Speechless
Did you ever wonder why…
- Your conversations with women either go nowhere or die similar an engine without fuel?
- You manage to talk to women for longer than five minutes, just you can't get them to exist excited most yous?
- You already have exciting conversations with women, only not the success you desire notwithstanding?
Maybe you lot take analyzed other men's flirting behavior and wondered why it looks so piece of cake for them, while yous seem paralyzed and first doubting yourself confidence…
Or peradventure information technology'southward less dramatic, and you're simply hither because yous want to pimp your social skills up a notch.
Whatever the reason, I am here to provide you with conversation techniques to concenter, seduce, and keep women (if she's cool plenty).
And not simply that. You tin utilize these conversation techniques anywhere, anytime. Whether you want to make a strong impression at a job interview or to make new friends.
The skills you will learn today are then useful in so many areas of life that you could call them real-life superpowers.
I bet you can tell I'm motivated!
Here's a summary of what I am about to tattoo into your brain today:
- 13 Golden conversation techniques to keep a conversation going for as long every bit you like
- How to first a conversation with a adult female
- How to attain More with less
- High-Touch on things to talk well-nigh with a girl
- A SIMPLE method to turn an ordinary conversation with a woman into high-level-flirting
- More insights how to keep a conversation with a woman…
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You'll get my best stuff absolutely complimentary: 12 Opening lines that actually work, my 5 best texting tips (including re-create-paste lines for Tinder), and the Friendzone Houdini. Download the Transformation Kit here.
How I learned how to talk to women
The story I'yard about to tell you is a piddling painful… Only I've learned and grown from it, so keep your pity for yourself. Thanks though.
Anyway, there is a technique that I already used in loftier schoolhouse. You want to know which one?
Copy + Paste.
Looking back, it ain ' t that stoopid. Do you lot really believe that Picasso painted the Guernica with his offset brushstroke? Or that Eminem was born to double-time spitting?
Probably not.
You tin can bet your donkey that they accept learned a shit ton from their role models and colleagues (or permit me put it this way: they were inspired by them).
In earlier, society had an educational system consisting of some and then-called "guilds." A student learned from his master past emulating his noesis, wisdom, and skills.
Nowadays, y'all are but thrown into a big pot of cognition in the promise that something will stick. Both have advantages and disadvantages, of grade.
Anyway, my dating strategy in 12th grade was to clarify the coolest dude in schoolhouse down to the smallest detail. He looked like a tanned surfer boy and had kissed almost all (at least the pretty ones) girls.
I spent hours sitting on the library burrow, watching him flirt, and taking notes. Some might say I was a hardcore nerd (that'southward how it must have looked from the exterior), but I've never been much into schoolhouse stuff.
I was only interested in one matter: Why is this guy such a womanizer?
My (rather scary) observations weren't useless! After a while, I adopted the behavioral patterns and language of this charismatic class clown, and I actually managed to lose my not-so-sacred virginity by doing so.
When the surprisingly beautiful brunette was laying in my artillery after sexual activity, I wondered:
"What does she know near me?"
I made a list in my caput, "Okay, she knows my name, my age, uh… ". Only that must have been it. Oh, aye, she must accept noticed my sense of humor. And where I live (obviously).
The crux of the matter may surprise y'all:
Despite the circumstances, she said it felt similar she'd known me for years... Information technology felt somehow special to her.
I was happy that day, and I fell asleep with a smile on my nerdy face.
13 ways how to keep a conversation with a woman
Through my virtually scientific research of the school surfer boy, I knew PRECISELY through which chat techniques I had triggered this feeling in her.
But you lot don't have to do what I did. Everything I wrote down in my schoolhouse file and caused over the years, you can now larn in 10 minutes.
With greetings from your chief executive Dan de Ram.
Tip #ane: How to actually strike up a conversation with a girl
"God damn, how do I starting time a conversation with a random woman?"
I tin can sympathise if you're asking yourself this question.
And considering y'all don't know how, you don't talk to girls that much. Also understandable.
But deep downward, in that location'southward something else at stake…
I encounter it once more and again with our Bootcamp participants. They are often terrified of approaching a woman. Mainly because they don't know how to do information technology, or they recall they demand the perfect conversation starter.
When I give them an opening line, and they use it, suddenly everything is fine: the women appreciate the backbone, and the compliments pb to a sweet grin on their faces.
After a few exercises, the participants get the hang of it and easily come with their own original ideas for approaching women.
If you are not there nevertheless and have no thought what to say to a girl, I got something for y'all:
12 Opening lines that e'er hook.
Many men have difficulties with what to say AFTER they approach a lady for the first time.
They are more agape of the conversation itself than they are of the Boogeyman.
"Uhhhh, yes, um… (nervously looking around)... Uh, take a nice day, and …"
What should I talk about?
A question you may have asked yourself at some bespeak.
In my feel, this is the greatest fear men have in my coaching sessions. And it is absolutely not necessary.
We will blow information technology away with penetrating ability. With a wrecking brawl that Miley Cyrus would be jealous of.
Tip #two: Answer your own questions
I suppose you really want to get to know her and non simply use her to fill the empty infinite in your bed.
If the latter is the case, we have tips for you besides, but not in this article. Are you lot still here? Perfect, let'southward non waste matter time and get right dorsum to the question:
How exercise yous get to know someone?
The simple answer: By request questions. Piece of cake, huh?
I can already hear Wannabe dating coaches and loyal supporters of the PUA community bi*ching:
"Request questions is Incorrect. You lot should always codify statements. Questions are dull, and you demand as well much investment from the woman. She's non up for that, Dan."
Eeeeaasy cowboy, relax.
Don't guess as well chop-chop. Firstly, this technique is far from asking 1 question after the other like the FBI, and secondly, there is a nuance that makes the conversation run very naturally.
Curious?
Suppose you ask her where she lives. What do you think her answer will exist? How many words will information technology consist of?
Probably from no more than than two words like "in London" or something like that. And yep, that'due south all you can wait from her.
It is not surprising that she gives such brusk answers to strangers. Remember, she doesn't know you lot, and so why would she tell y'all her whole life story?
One fundamentally important thing is however missing:
Trust.
That's why I'k going to show you lot how to build trust with a elementary method:
By answering your own question first.
Kinda like this:
"Ah, I live just in the center of Amsterdam. I take a very brilliant flat with an amazing view. Suuuper comfortable. When I get home in the evening, I stroll around the beautiful urban center and get myself some dinner."
Every bit you tin see, I didn't only mention that I am currently living in Amsterdam (I rarely live in the same urban center for more than six months). If yous want to go the conversation going, you demand to do more than that.
This is what I also do:
- I say information technology very enthusiastically. I ever attempt to tell everything with 100% passion. The mindset here is, "Everything I say is awesome." She will experience your passion and adapt to it.
- I use open loops.
- Last but non the least (and very effective)… By giving details, I show that it is normal to talk to strangers. From then on, trust increases enormously.
If she doesn't seem interested anyway: No problem.
But inquire another question. As long every bit she doesn't run away and is standing in front of yous with a smile, you tin assume that everything is fine.
A second pick is to skip questions. But start talking about where you lot live without question ever being asked. Who cares.
"Can you just talk to women almost anything without transition, Dan?"
100%! Women are people as well.
And deep within, every person needs social contact. We cannot and will non live without it.
Transitions are therefore not necessary.
"Oh, well, you lot know, I live in…"
And you lot starting time telling the story. Then you briefly ask:
"Where do you live?"
I take a whole commodity with questions that make any woman experience special and interesting.
Cheque them out here:
>> 111 Not-Boring Questions to Get to Know Her -Real Self- Better
Tip #iii: Be a bridge architect
Long beard, Rudolf, small gifts, red costume, snow-sleigh…
What comes to your heed?
95% chance you're thinking almost Santa Claus right now.
You associated my words with Santa Claus WITHOUT me mentioning him at all.
Y'all can do that with anything, it doesn't even have to be logical. After all, we're talking to women, not Captain Spock. 😉
Listen to a chat between two best friends. They're doing topic hopping, which means they proceed jumping from one topic to some other.
You don't have to imitate me to empathize women meliorate. Sometimes I do things that may be too far. I'1000 aware of that, but I am only trying to share my insights, so you don't take to do those things.
Anyway, ane day I snuck into the ladies' room in a lodge and locked myself in a cabin. Why? Because I'chiliad a pervert?
I cannot completely deny that, but that evening I had the most innocent intentions: To find out what women talk about when there's no trace of men.
Amid the topics that were discussed in detail by the ladies were: men, work colleagues, girlfriends, sex…
Funny enough, a year later, I institute an empirical study that confirmed my own investigation behind closed doors.
The following tabular array results from this study. As yous tin can see, women mostly talk about family unit, relationship problems, and sexual partners.
Exercise you call up she will enquire for an explanation when you lot jump dorsum and along betwixt two unrelated topics? Absolutely not.
If you aren't so good at building bridges between unlike topics, I recommend a elementary but constructive exercise:
- Choose a topic that you lot find interesting. Bonus points if it is a topic that women tin also relate to (tip: psychology).
- Then write downwards five words that you associate with this topic. Information technology's ok and even desirable if some of these words only accept a fiddling to do with the topic in the broadest sense.
- Then, for each of these words, write downwardly a story from your life that has something to do with it. You lot have an abundance of experiences.
Possibly you lot tin't come up up with a story right now considering I put you nether pressure. This issue volition exist ten times stronger in forepart of a woman, so it'south smart to ready.
Now you tin do topic hopping. Jump back and along between these stories and other topics while talking to a woman.
How to starting time a story? To be honest, there'south nothing easier than that if you use a good transitional phrase:
"By the fashion, that reminds me of… "
This is a natural way to give a conversation a new direction.
On to the 3rd and final conversation technique, so y'all NEVER run out of things to say. This is the complete opposite of what I told you earlier. This 180-degree U-turn will knock your socks off.
Tip #four: Say more by saying less
If yous employ the previous conversation techniques, I am convinced that you should have a chat at present.
There is another trouble, though…
Unfortunately, I oftentimes run across men who go to a betoken where they cannot be stopped. They echo i story after another and/or constantly ask the woman new things.
They talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk…
Why? The main reason is that they're afraid of…
……… Silence ………
But you lot can likewise (and peculiarly!) seduce women through silence.
Many men fear that pauses in a conversation mean that the conversation is non exciting enough.
Merely y'all should requite her a risk to talk. You lot actually want that.
In this study, you will encounter that, on average, men interrupt women very frequently and thus do not allow them to stop or invest in the chat themselves.
#mansplaining
Remember, she's human too. She has to collect her thoughts before proverb something only like you practise.
Add to that the expectation that yous're going to interrupt her because the average guy does it to her all the time.
You don't want to exist an average, Dude!
So look a few seconds after you finish your sentence. Or after she finishes hers. It'southward highly possible she wasn't quite done with her story.
Someone once told me about a comparing that is so special that it has remained in my memory:
Yous tin't really talk while you're breathing in. And that's fifty% of the fourth dimension. Use this breath-in moment to actually hear what she'due south but said. Or course what y'all actually want to say next. That manner, you'll run into that in that location's a lot more to her pretty face up than you think.
How does this work in practice?
At the beginning of the conversation, yous have a little weight on your shoulders. As a man, you should start the conversation in the best case, only in any case, lead information technology, so make sure you have the word material you want. Y'all can't expect her to be in charge of the chat.
Kickoff, YOU have to invest and create trust. Subsequently a few minutes, the situation is normal for her, and it will exist a smoother ride. Starting time bumps volition announced, but you take to take them for granted.
Furthermore, you lot shouldn't fall into the usual trap of focusing too much on what You take to say, just also give her the chance to participate in the conversation actively. You even want that to happen.
Let me illustrate this principle so that you will never forget it and can fifty-fifty name it in your slumber:
Let'southward say you're busy for days with a Christmas gift for your little brother. Every evening y'all go to the attic where you secretly stick, cut, and dye.
You are not convinced at commencement, but then y'all put even more energy into it. You know how time-consuming information technology is for such a surprise, but your little bro is worth it!
You create the perfect gift.
On December 6th, yous give it to your brother. But he doesn't like it…
He breaks information technology, throws it on the flooring, and runs away angrily.
How would you experience? If yous're not a psychopath, I'd assume you lot'd feel like shit.
Why?
Because people give more importance to something when they have put a lot of free energy into it.
Moral of this story: Let a adult female invest as much as possible into the conversation.
In the best case, she will invest more in your conversation than Dan Bilzerian does in escorting ladies.
So far, then good. Now you take effective tools to keep a conversation going properly.
Just yous certainly don't want to end up in the dreaded Friend Zone by being her #1 contact person for her problems.
If that is your goal, don't let me terminate you.
Past the way… get here everything yous need to know to avoid the friendzone forever. And even escape information technology:
>> Go Out of the Friend Zone & Into Her Lover Zone – seven Magic Moves
But if you've had enough of this and desire to acquire how to create REAL ATTRACTION, read on.
We now come up to the keys that will add together the necessary spice to your conversations so that women will perceive you as a sexually bonny human being.
Tip #5: R.I.P. Irksome Questions
I've mentioned it before, but the disadvantage of only request questions is not simply that you let HER do all the hard work, merely more importantly, information technology doesn't seem authentic.
People often ask questions without actually being interested in the answer. Most people ask questions but to avoid silence and out of fear that the conversation might dice otherwise.
This sub communicates that you don't trust your own abilities when it comes to having a conversation with women. You lot practically leave information technology upwards to her. Not very gentlemanly…
Out of fear of judgment, many men prefer to stay in the safe (= wearisome) zone and ask standard questions.
For women, this is extremely tiring and dull. You absorb their energy like a black pigsty.
This way, you are basically asking for a rejection.
Let's compare a chat with a bank business relationship. By asking questions, you withdraw money. You're non depositing annihilation. After a while, the balance turns night blood-red, and it looks bad.
What you should practise instead is go on a healthy bank account by depositing enough money.
Subsequently you have invested plenty, and the residual is positive, the interest takes over your job. You tin can sit back and relax on your pile of gold. In other words: she will invest.
Do you demand more conversation techniques to generate these aureate piles of attraction?
Tip #6: Know her meliorate than she knows herself
You want her to take an active role in the conversation? We already know that asking questions is not the way to do this.
Which is why you should rephrase them as… *drum coil*… statements!
This way, you can provoke a reaction. Of course, she tin can't let you become abroad with it if the claim is false. She is about forced to justify herself and correct yous.
On the other hand, she can't exist quiet either, if you're right. As she then wants to know how you knew what was said.
You tin, therefore, run into using statements every bit a win-win situation.
Depending on where you approach women, you lot tin use unlike statements.
In the club, you can use challenging statements. The environs is ideal for this. During the twenty-four hours, out on the street, I would take information technology a little easier. It is exciting enough for her to be approached in this situation because it is still unusual.
Hither are a few examples that volition assistance you go on the correct track:
"You lot seem similar someone who can creatively paint."
"You seem like someone who lives in a village. You lot don ' t need an alarm clock because yous only permit the rooster wake y'all in the morning."
"Y'all seem like a real-world traveler to me. Traveling around Indonesia with your pink backpack is your thing, isn't it?"
"You seem similar someone who comes from a small farm. You are kinda the opposite of a metropolis girl…"
Pro tip:
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Every bit you tin see, these statements all start with the words "You seem like…"
With these words, yous indicate your arrows at her personality.
Who is she?
That's what we want to observe out using this method…
EVERYONE (and especially every woman) wants to feel special. If you take this into account in your conversations, your touch on on people quadruples.
Since anybody'due south favorite discipline is him/herself, you don't need to put a lot of try into asking her piercing questions. All y'all take to practise is use the following chat "technique":
Tip #vii: Active listening
Suppose yous were to brand the post-obit argument:
"I don't think you lot're someone who was born in the urban center. You're more similar a girl from a hamlet."
The answer could then be as follows:
"Yeah, that's true. I'm originally from Ukraine merely moved to Munich for my studies."
She has now given you some information.
Whenever I receive such an answer, I immediately know four topics I tin talk about, questions I can ask, personal stories I can tell, and ways to tease her.
Ukraine, her studies, moving to Munich, living in a village…
Yet, y'all don't necessarily have to step in immediately, because she may deepen her data herself if yous employ these three standard phrases:
"Interesting… I'd like to know more nigh that."
"Tell me more well-nigh information technology."
"What practice you mean?"
For case:
"You lot moved for your studies? Tell me more about it."
Why does it work so well?
You lot bear witness that yous heed. That, in turn, shows you're interested in her. And you give her the command to move on.
This works well for women because they notice male person leadership and determination very hot by nature.
Men lead. So it is quite normal (and desirable) that you as a man command in a positive manner what the woman should do.
Don't know how to pb? Or express your masculine border that attracts the feminine? Practise a quick cheque-up here:
>> 7 Means to Get a More than Masculine Border (to Residual the Feminine)
However, nosotros can go one step further with this chat technique. Autonomously from letting her talk endlessly while you can sit back in a quiet arctic mode, information technology creates a deep connection with her.
So it is not surprising that if you master this technique to the smallest detail, she will say the following words to y'all:
"Dan! I feel similar we've known each other for years."
(Yes, fifty-fifty with y'all she will always say my proper name 😉 )
So with this technique comes a lot of responsibility, equally Peter Parker'southward uncle would probably say if he had been a dating passenger vehicle (and wasn't killed by some random robber).
Can y'all have this responsibility?
Yes?
100% certain?
Then keep reading!
Tip #8: Communication with a woman on an emotional level
People have a deep need to exist understood. The feeling of entering a deep connexion with another person inspires their soul.
A deep connection is created based on emotions. Not based on facts.
Feelings are easier described through pictures.
The Expressionist fine art move, for example, allows artists to express their emotions gratuitous of any logic, thereby reaching millions of people.
You can likewise apply this "Picasso Effect" when flirting.
Look at these two sentences and discover the different effect it has on your emotional world:
"The car has 200 horsepower, four wheels, and is painted red."
Or:
"The car is a real racing monster, racing across the route similar an arrow. Its acceleration would fifty-fifty impress NASA."
I don't know about yous, but I already know which car I would rather accept in my garage.
For figurative speaking, I employ a 2 uncomplicated tools:
Metaphors and analogies will go your new best friends.
A metaphor is an analogy of a word. Example: "castle in the air."
An analogy is a visual comparing. Example: "I have as many bikini girls effectually me equally a lifeguard. "
In practice, this may look like this:
"For the first few weeks after my return from volunteering in Africa, I didn't feel like I vest here at all anymore."
An emotional response could look like this:
"The difference in lifestyle is enormous. It must take had an impact on your world view."
Or:
"I know the feeling. Information technology's similar, after living alone for years, y'all're moving back in with your parents."
Women are totally into this kind of visualization. But pay attending to what they post on Social Media…
Tip #nine: How she gets to know you lot
You know…
Nosotros, humans, are mainly busy with ourselves. We are the center of the universe.
Of course, this is why we like to talk about… us…
Most men try to impress a woman and therefore talk mainly near THEMSELVES. They sell themselves, so to speak, to the adult female, and recollect that this is how they get her attending.
Only information technology doesn't piece of work out besides equally they hope.
I advise another way that turns the tables:
If you let the woman talk about herself (and, of course, listen to her instead of staring at her breasts), so you go from being a seller to beingness a heir-apparent.
You lot just sit there and retrieve about whether you like her answers and whether yous call back she is cool enough. At the aforementioned time, she thinks to herself:
"Well, he lets me talk, listens, is interested: Who is this guy?"
Make her experience like she tin be herself with you. That way, you get exactly what y'all want: a feminine woman who feels comfortable with y'all.
Tip #x: The intention behind your words
Most men, who accept nothing to exercise with the fine art of seduction, think that information technology is important WHAT you say to a woman when yous want to win her over or get her into bed.
I can't deny that WHAT you say is often of import, simply I have kissed women many times without saying a single word multiple times. After all, the music in clubs is often loud, and I want to spare my angel'south voice.
Option-up dudes merits that it's not what you say that matters, but HOW you say it. Do you lot say something like a bunny or with male person determination and confidence?
I like that meliorate… That explains why you tin often say the biggest crap and women still react very positively to it.
The trouble with this is that many pick-upward dudes span the bow, start saying ridiculous things, thus giving the whole "success with women" community a bad reputation.
Moreover, this view is notwithstanding incomplete.
Yes, WHAT yous say is of import, HOW you say it is important, but nigh people forget the WHY.
WHY are you saying something? What is your intention? Is your intention to take reward of a woman? Is your intention to brand a woman's day? To tease her? Guide her?
Your intention and motivation will always shine through.
It always starts with the WHY, then comes the HOW then (and simply then, merely it counts!) the actual content.
You know me, and so of class, you too know my nerdy side. Simply spiral it, here's a flowchart to illustrate it:
Instance:
Let's say you are a passionate fitness junkie, and information technology's not but important to you that a woman is doing sports, but even a MUST.
And then y'all ask her:
"Practice y'all ever work out?"
Here, the WHY is that you want to find out if she meets your standards.
HOW would you communicate WHAT (= "Do you ever work out") and then?
Probably similar to a CEO at a job interview: with a frown, serious look, and maybe even crossed arms.
If you are very conscious of WHY you are saying something, then an advisable HOW and WHAT automatically follows.
All y'all then take to practice is this:
Tip #11: Use 100% confidence
There's one thing a lot of insecure men practise that I consider one of the greatest flirting sins of all…
They treat a woman like a princess.
You lot are looking for a solution for each of her issues, respond her messages immediately, and are always there for her.
You practically do everything for this ONE woman.
That'southward very overnice of you only… Practice you really want to make a adult female your #i priority in life?
You're not doing yourself or the women any favor.
>> 'Am I Unattractive?' + ten Other Biggest Self-Sabotaging Turnoff'due south
Men are very adamant, whether in their career or the development of a badass personality, and that'south a good matter.
But if you treat women like that, you're only shooting yourself in the foot, with a bazooka.
Imagine what it must experience similar to have someone around yous all the time, which is dependent on your attending and love…
It makes you lot look similar an annoying little boy.
How can you make clear that you are not a dependent brat, but a man with standards and vision?
By proverb everything with passion.
Don't talk virtually your Porsche, but if y'all're going to talk about cars, so rather nigh the passion behind them. Tell her how free you experience when you drive along a country road and hear the sound of the engine in the background.
If you have a chore where you piece of work with people, talk about how nice information technology is to make other people grin and how it makes your day better every time you tin can help.
Women follow positive emotions. If you lot tin trigger those in her, the probability that she wants to see yous again shoots upward similar a SpaceX rocket.
Tip #12: Flirt shamelessly
A definition of flirting could be:
"Teasing/provoking each other in a loving, positive style."
You should not just TALK to a woman, just you should too FLIRT with her. Why?
I recollect of flirting as a game. Ideally, it becomes more and more exciting and thrilling between yous. Every sentence gets funnier. The game is all about who tin can all-time behave the tension. Whoever breaks information technology, loses.
When it comes to successful flirting, the winner should clearly always exist the same:
You, the man!
If the woman wins, she sees information technology – consciously or unconsciously – as a sign that you are not strong enough.
Unfortunately, it'southward unremarkably the men who lose in the flirt game. But we will preclude this from at present on (at least for you) by internalizing the THC principle.
THC stands for:
- T easing
- H umor
- C hallenge
Nerd way activated.
Permit me explicate:
- Claiming her by talking to her as if she was a little girl crossing the street without her mom for the first time.
- Tease her by looking at her like she's a cute little troublemaker.
- Exist humorous by joking around as y'all would do with a buddy.
That's how you finish a woman from thinking:
All the insights nigh the THC-method to flirting, you lot tin find here:
>> 7 Unexpected Flirting Tips and Hacks to Get Irresistible
Tip #13: How to hack the conversations Matrix
Damn, that was quite a comprehensive article…
Now yous know all the ingredients to go along a conversation with a woman.
But there is one matter missing:
Practice!
Conversation techniques are simply the sort of things that demand to be skillful a hundred or a grand times to be able to apply them blindly.
Go out in that location and put the tips into exercise, otherwise, they will go to waste on this website or in your brain. We don't want that.
Let me know how it goes, and allow me know if you demand any help with it.
Just recollect of me equally a whiter version of Morpheus, helping you – the Called One – to meet the truth and change the Matrix.
And to assist you hack the matrix and yell: "I know Kung Fu!" I accept something for you.
My free Transformation Kit filled with my all-time advice.
You've got a ton of examples and principles hither. Simply to engrave it into you system, the Kit will practise it for you.
Get your hack, my Transformation Kit, to the matrix right here.
May you do well!
Your Bropheus,
Dan de Ram
Cease awkward conversations
and painful rejections
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Source: https://www.attractiongym.com/how-to-keep-a-conversation-with-a-woman/
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